Fandomstuck
by Joeyscraggy
Summary: 4 children and a reality transforming game. Series included since chapter 1: Umineko no Naku Koro ni, Pokémon, Hunger Games, Pixar. (Chapter 6 finished. Look forward to another interactive chapter soon.). Currently looking for a beta reader! If you're available send me a PM
1. Be the girl

A young child stands on a room.

... Actually no. Standing would require feets on the floor. The child is more like FLOATING. Ok, that's alright, let's begin again.

A young child floats on a room. It just happens to be this child's 18th birthday. Would you like to name this... aw fuck it! The oportunity just passed like 6 years ago, along OTHER THINGS THAT MUST NOT BE TALKED ABOUT, so no naming allowed.

** Look at nameplate**

Well, there's a nameplate lying up there, let's check it out

"Ushiromiya Umineko"

** Examine room**

Your name is UMINEKO USHIROMIYA.

This is your room, the one where you're stand-er i mean, FLOATING. Well, you like to FLOAT AROUND a lot, when people are not looking at you, it's just one of your HOBBIES.

Around your room there's WEIRD PAINTINGS of TASTEFUL CIRCLE SPELLS, you made most of them. You have a passion for NOVEL WRITING and MYSTERY MAKING, so usual your friends are tired of your CLOSED ROOM SHENANINGANS. Well, that doesn't bother you, after all you could KILL THEM IN ONE OF YOUR NOVELS. But the thing you like the most is watching LOVESTUCK MOVIES and GOLD, boy, do you like GOLDEN STUFF OF SUSPICIOUS NATURE. Anyway, you're a MASTER in SPELLS AND MAGIC, and sometimes you're a showoff in that regard.

Your CHUMHANDLE is goldenEqualizer (GE) and *you change your typing color to red when youre saying the truth* or |when youre speculating, maybe to a blue color|

What will you do?

** Umineko: Stop floating and open box**

You stop floating and walk to the CLOSED BOX. It has CHAINS AND LOCKS all over it, you'll need a KEY.

** Umineko: Examine your sylladex**

You open your SYLLADEX. Its configured in MYSTERY MODUS. It's a tricky modus that allows you to CAPTCHALOGUE things and turn them into magical versions of themselves. Well, as long as NO ONE IS LOOKING. When you're observed, the objects revert to their original state. You have to have good memory while using it, as magic forms rarely resemble the original object. Welp, there's the KEY, you think, hiding as a GOLDEN BUTTERFLY

** Umineko: Retrieve "key"**

You take out the GOLDEN BUTTERFLY and... Oops!, that's a mackerel. Stop messing around you dumbass. You let it be on the floor. There's another suspicious thing on your sylladex, a GOLDEN HAIRPIN, let's try with that.

** Umineko: Retrieve key**

You take out the HAIRPIN and there it goes. It fits on the lock you were trying to open, and WHY FOR? You'll discover it when you open the box.

** Umineko: Open box**

The box makes a clicking sound as you open it. You look at it's contents. There's a SET OF 7 STAKES, three WINCHESTER RIFLES, a RED PAINT BUCKET, a COPY OF SFRUB, some SHEETS OF PAPER and a SUSPICIOUS LOOKING HEART. Yuck, why do you even keep this in a box? Anyway, let's take it all.

** Umineko: Equip weapons and captchalogue everything else.**

You equip the SET OF 7 STAKES in your STRIFE SPECIBUS STAKEKIND, and the WINCHERSTER RIFLES on the RIFLEKIND. The moment they touch the deck, you feel the same funny sensation when some of your things morph in your Sylladex.

Then you proceed to CAPTCHALOGUE EVERYTHING ELSE. You take the bucket and it turns into a REAL BLOOD BUCKET, the MACKEREL again into a GOLDEN BUTTERFLY, the SHEETS OF PAPER into GOLDEN ENVELOPES, and the HEART into... nevermind, don't take that thing. Finally you captchalogue the COPY OF SFRUB and oddly, it doesn't turn into anything. What will you do next?

** Umineko: Do something stupid.**

Ew! Don't... Ugh. You took the heart and threw it at the window. Now it's broken and you touched it. Don't get close to me you psycho. Do something more useful, like... Look, there's someone pestering you!

** Umineko: Answer Pesterchum**

compulsiveCatcher (CC) began pestering goldenEqualizer (GE) at 2:57

CC: -A wild Umineko appeared!-

GE: ugh, no again

CC: -What will you do?-

GE: look you idiot

GE: *noone likes that stupid routine* get it?

GE: so knock it off

CC: -Umineko used Knock off-

CC: -It's not very effective-

CC: -It knocked CC's Laptop to the ground-

GE: cackle cackle cackle

CC: -CC used Game invitation-

GE: oh right, the game. |those guys told you to be my server| right?

CC: -Umineko used Blue truth-

CC: -Umineko's blue truth is super effective-

CC: -CC accedes-

GE: wait what? no, nonononononononononononono

CC: -CC fainted-

GE: you *incompetent piece of shit* come back here!

CC: -Umineko gained 1129 exp. points!-

GE: nopenopenope i don't want to be your freaking client!

compulsiveCatcher (CC) ceased pestering goldenEqualizer (GE)

GE: *fuck*

** Umineko: Level up**

What the fu... Suddenly your whole body starts glowing. Congratulations! Much to your DISMAY, you leveled up. Now you're level 18, and you know what that means right? That's it: a new move. But you already know 4 moves. Which one would you like to forget to learn Medium reincarnation?

-Red truth

-Blue truth

-Knock off

-Endless magic

** Umineko: Forget Knock off**

Like hell you would, it's so much fun to drop that idiot's Laptop. However the name sounds to tempting, you're considering it and... Aarg! You focused so much into Knock off that you forgot it. Instead you learned Medium reincarnation! Would you like to test it?

** Umineko: use Medium reincarnation**

You try to use Medium reincarnation and... poof! Nothing. Why? You're not dead, you sillyhead. Well, all the hype and everything for nothing. You're so pissed off you want to kill something. What will you do?

** Umineko: Kill time**

Well, you suppose that's more proactive than killing a living being right? You open the door and go out. Boy, do you seem hungry. How about going downstairs for a little snack?

**Umineko: Examine house**

Your manor is chockfull of CAT MEMORABILIA. There's CAT POSTERS, CAT STATUES, CAT PAINTINGS, LIVING CATS all over the place. At this moment you really don't mind it. It's your guardian's tastes after all, and you're on good termns with her, even if you shouldn't be. After all you were supposed to kill her when you turned 12. But she and you made an arrangement and to be honest you really don't like killing that much. Outside of fiction that is.

Well, and you live in a manor. Your guardian is really wealthy, and there's a pile of gold in the living room. She told you you can't touch it till you make yourself independent, under the fate of explosion. Well, then, you go downstair and pass the freaking 10 ton gold pile and to the kitchen.

**Umineko: Look around for your guardian.**

You enter to the kitchen and, hell yes! Your guardian is nowhere to be seen. You suppose she's busy with some CAT RELATED HIJINKS. Time to seize the refrigerator.

** Umineko: Prepare tasty treat**

The refrigerator only contains MACKEREL for some reason. That and PLUMS. Lots of PLUMS, and PLUM-MADE PRODUCTS. You guess you have to adapt to the situations.

You take the mackerel out and pickle it, then you fry it and season it with plum vinegar. You put the results in a plate.

** Umineko: Taste the treat**

Well, it's not as bad as you expected it. Sometimes people say you're a MAGICAL GOHDA CHEF and it shows, whatever that means. Ok, then let's move forward to more serious bussiness.

**Umineko: Go upstairs to your room**

We are again where we started. The window is still broken and oh, look, someone is pestering you.

** Umineko: Answer Pesterchum**

capitolRevolutionist (CR) began pestering goldenEqualizer (GE) at 3:14

CR: Err Umineko? Are you still there?

CR: Dude, or dudess, I don't really know/care, you don't answer

CR: I will call you dude regardless

CR: Is everything ok?

GE: ok, who the fuck told that incompetent dimwit to be my server?

CR: o_o Wut?

GE: *one of you two fuckwads told cc to be my server player* see what i did there?

CR: First of all, he's not an incompetent dimwit

CR: Second, everyone is a valuable team member, and we should cooperate if we want to (survive)

CR: And third, well, it was a democratic decision. It was also decided that you would be my server. Do you have anything against that?

GE: seriously, use the blue, that was one hell of speculation, but lemme break it for you

GE: *cc is an incompetent dimwit and nobody told me shit about him being my server*

CR: Could you seriously limit your Red Truth usage please? And you can't say the second point in red amirite?

CR: u_ú

GE: watch me *cc can die and nothing ha-GAAAAAAH*

GE: *cc is expend-AAAAUGHHH*

GE: fuck, you win this round. still i cant see why cant say it on red

CR: Because everyone is important, and don't you dare say otherwise on red

GE: you dont believe this bullshit and you know it. anyway, im installing this thing. be right back in a second

CR: Okay _u_

CR: By the way, happy birthday! -u-

CR: I send you a present already, hope you like it.

GE: err thanks...

goldenEqualizer (GE) ceased pestering capitolRevolutionist (GE)

** Umineko: Install Sfrub**

You insert the Sfrub disc on your PC. A window appears detailing the installation time. It will take a while. Why don't you try being someone else for a change?


	2. Be CC

** Be CC**

You can't keep calling him CC forever, you should name him. And you're lucky, he turned 12 this year and he hasn't been named yet. Hurry! Name him!

** Enter name**

You name him INCOMPETENT DIMWIT. That's an awful name. Who are you? A HEARTLESS WITCH?

** Try again**

You name him RED POKÉMON. That's better.

** Examine room**

You are RED POKÉMON. But your MOST CHERISHED FRIENDS call you REDDY.

You have some PRETTY NEAT interests. Like your collection of RARE BIOLOGICAL SPECIMENES contained on SPHERIC BOTTLES all over your room. Speaking of which you do seem to like BALLS, oh boy, your taste in BALLS is so much MISINTERPRETED, but you can't help but like them. You use them to store the CRITTERS you find on your way.

Among other things you may like is ADVENTURE. You always like to keep TRAVELING from TOWN to TOWN in search for new EXPERIENCES. It also helps you CAPTCHALOGING things for your SYLLADEX MODUS. And well, your more MUNDANE hobbies include GOING OUT FISHING, HUNTING, PARTICIPATING IN PAGEANT CONTEST, ROLEPLAYING, among other things.

But let's elaborate on that last one. Whenever you CHAT with your FRIENDS, you use the CHUMHANDLE compulsiveCatcher (CC) and you always like ROLEPLAY like -A wild example appeared!- this. It sometimes tends to ANNOY people.

What will you do?

** Red: Check bottles**

You check one of your most prized bottles. It contains a RODENT OF SOME SORT, trapped and kept alive on CRYOGENICAL GEL. It is YELLOW and legends say it's ELECTRIC.

You can (painfully) attest to the veracity of said legends. Anyway, you touch the TASTEFUL TEXTURE imprinted on the bottle, while you imagine yourself throwing it and making the critter obey your commands.

** Red: Make dreams come true.**

You throw the bottle to the ground. As expected, it breaks in pieces and the rodent wakes up. Alarmed, it runs at you and shocks you with HIGH VOLTAGE. How naive of you to think it will subjugate that easily.

You're knocked out on the floor, and it feels kind of COMFTY, ignoring your SECOND DEGREE BURNS. Anyway, what will you do?

** Red: Rise up.**

You try to get up from the floor, but actually, this is really soft, but that's not strange, because your whole floor is covered in a FUR CARPET. You sometimes like to sleep here instead of your bed. But suddenly, you remember there are things you must do, and you stand up.

The rodent is chewing on some MYSTERIOUS CABLES behind your bed, and you can't help but STARE AT IT'S ADORABLENESS.

** Red: Take rodent**

Nope! You're smarter than that to take an electric rodent chewing on connected cables with your bare hands. Instead you search on your SYLLADEX for an EMPTY BOTTLE.

** Red: Examine Sylladex**

You always use your CAPTCHADEX modus, which allows you to store items in order of TYPES. You could go hours and hours talking about the different types there is, the

relationships between them, and effectiveness, but let's cut it for a second ok?. You search in the GLASS/WIND category and there you go! #354 EMPTYBOTTLE. You then remember your Captchadex also offers information about what is stored.

"#354 EMPTYBOTTLE

GLASS SPHERE item

HT 4 in

WT .2 lb

A containing item of some sort. Legends said that it can hold its volume in any substance

GLASS/WIND type

Evolves from GLASSHARD. Evolves into EMPTYBOX"

Yup, that's it. USELESS TRIVIA, but for some reason you seem to be addicted to it. Better get going to catch that little critter.

** Red: Catch the rat**

You turn to the electric mouse hanging from the cables. It sees you and you see it. Bottle in hand you smirk at it and then SWOOOSH! A single throw and the little fella is inside the bottle. Suddenly, a cryogenical fluid encases the rodent and makes it fall in the hands of Morpheus, that is, until you need it again.

You pick up the bottle and captchalogue it. This is the part you like the most, reading the trivia:

"#092 RAYSQUEAK

THUNDER RODENT lusus

HT 3 in

WT 1 lb

This is one of the most common lusus. It holds enough voltage to make a growing child an idiot

ELECTRIC type

Evolves from SPARKSQUEAK. Evolves into THUNDERSQUEAK"

After learning this (unnecessary) piece of information, you take out the bottle containing the Raysqueak and you allocate it on your Strife Deck under the BALLKIND modus. Whelp, let's continue with the business here.

** Red: Allocate more critters**

To be honest, it's better to be prepared. After all, today you will have to kill your Guardian. You take another 5 creatures in bottles, and when you try to take another one, the Strife Deck rebounds it. You forgot this type of modus is limited to 6.

** Red: Engage in silly hijinks**

Not now you dumbass. You have to pack the present for Umineko and send it. Luckily you have already captchalogged it all wrapped. You like to be prepared for anything.

Let's try and send it from the PC. You open your Captchadex and search for it. Next, you run the "someone's PC's" program on your desktop and... Well what do we have here? Those are your friends opening a memo on the Pesterchum! Let's check it out.

** Red: Open memo**

toymakerScareless (TS) opened a memo on board WHY DO WE BOTHER

TS: LEt's be quick... i'm on my school bathroom rite now...

TS: THis memo was for choosing who's with who...

TS: NOthing more nothing else...

TS: WEll till i get out of here, then you can use it for whatever you want...

capitolRevolutionist (CR) and compulsiveCatcher (CC) responded to memo

CR: Phhhhhffff hahahahahahahaha

CC: -A wild CR and CC appeared!-

CC: -But TS seems to be busy. What will you do-

TS: YOu dumb fools... stop this charade this instant...

CR: -u- Ok, ok soldier, rest. That's more info that we needed

CR: CC -we decide to run-

CC: -You escaped safely-

CC: hiiiii thereeee guyss :3

CC: do yalredy know whatcha giving to Umiii? :D

TS: REddy stop... this memo is for discussing more important things

TS: BUt yeah

CR: Me too. That idiot doesn't deserve shit.

CR: BTW, where's the idiot?

TS: WHo cares... we have here 50%+1, so we can decide stuff.

CC: guyssss its not the same without Umiii D:

CC: umiiis smart, and kewl and lol and kewt and yeah

CR: -_-

TS: LEt's make haste guys... topic is... who will be the server to whom...

TS: FIrst volunteers, then sacrifices

CR: You don't say that word ever! You hear me?!

TS: SOrry... my bad

TS: AArg... this is getting out of topic... focis people

TS: *FOcus

CR: Well, I don't have any problem with being your server/client, if you can spare me from being Umineko's

CR: =_= dude gets me on my nerves

CC: ooooooooh ohhhhhh i wanna be with Umiii :D puhleeeesssss?

TS: DO you want to be Umis server Reddy?... ANy objections?

CC: yyyyyuuuuuuuuppppp :3333333

CC: For me it's fine.

TS: ALlright... then it's settled. Reddy's Umi server...

CC: -Congratulations! Your CC evolved into Umineko's server!-

TS: REddy... stop those RP ways you have... you're derailing the conversation...

CC: sorry ;3

TS: LEt's focus on Umi ok... Who will be his/her client...

CR: Sheesh soldier, I told you I don't want anything to be with that bastard.

TS: DOn't try to push me into it... i'm not too fond of what s/he does or her ways...

TS: LIke have you seen his/her fanfics... she kills all of us

TS: ANd not in a nice way either... that person is a maniac...

CR: Reddy, dear, you should decide, please?

CC: aaaawight! ummm who should be?

CC: uuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmhhhhhhh

CC: -Go CR!-

TS: REddy decided...

TS: IT's 50%+1 so you're Umi's server...

CR: ... dear Reddy, could you please go and do whatever you like to do while adults talk?

TS: IT's not over yet...

TS: REddy don't go... please...

CC: -CC is confused-

CC: -CC hit himself-

CC: awiieeeee :'(

CR: *Mumbles*

CR: Fine, fine, I'll stay.

TS: THanks (pleasedon'tkillme)

TS: NExt one is you Reddy... who will be your server...

CR: ... I realized something

TS: ... CAre to explain...

CR: Just by positioning a single person's server and client you can fit the rest so everyone has a server and client.

CR: By the arrangement you made for Umineko, the only possible options are these

CR: Red's Umineko server

CR: Umineko is my server

CR: TS I'm your server

CR: And TS is Red server

CR: I made a diagram on Paint. Wanna look at it?

CR: img9 . imageshack . us / img9 / 9210 / diagramsm . png

CR: Shit, this thing is really picky with the links

CR: Just erase the spaces between words ok?

CC: oooooooooooohhhhhh whos *Asshub*

CR: o_o Noone Reddy.

CR: Now go to do your business dear.

TS: DOn't

CR: Aw shut up

CR banned CC from responding to memo

** Red: Continue your business**

Whelp, that was a really confusing conversation, but at least you have what you want right? Just being with your beloved friends and play a game...

You're really hopeless but that's not anyone's business. You resume the thing you were doing.

What were you at again?... Oh right! The present!

** Red: Check progress bar from Sfrub**

And there you go again, sidestepping from the whole issue like a champ. You check Sfrub progress bar and yup, it's almost filled up. You're sure excited. It means you're gonna see Umi in no time. So why don't you tell Umi the good news?

** Red: Pester Umineko**

You have the conversation we already read from chapter 1.

And hey, the response wasn't that bad. I mean, Umi didn't cursed you like the last time, or wrote a fanfic detailing your painful death, or both. The only bad thing is that your laptop is on the ground, broken. You're sure your auto-responder took your place without Umi knowing. Good thing it learns from watching you chat. Anyway, it seems that only the screen is dead, everything else is fine. Hope that disc didn't got any scratch.

** Red: Look around for a solution**

In your room there's a spherical shaped chest. You open it and its contents get scattered on the floor. You have:

-An ENCYCLOPEDIA OF FAUNA "OAK'S NATURAL LORE AND OTHER SHIT MADE UP BY 10 YEARS OLD"

-WORMS ON A FRESH DIRT BALL

-4 DIFFERENT SHIRTS

-AUGMENTED REALITY GO-GOGGLES

-RUNNING SHOES

What will you take?

** Red: Equip Running Shoes**

You take off your actual shoes and put on these babies. Man, they were really hyped, and really were worth it. They have a mechanism where you can press the heel for a second and poof, they reach high speed due to the pressurized air on them.

As it could be expected, you test them. As it could be expected, your room now has your silhouette stamped on a wall. Let's not abuse them.

** Red: Captchalogue Oak's encyclopedia**

This thing right here is one of your most prized non biological possessions. A signed copy of "Oak's Natural Lore and Other Shit Made up by 10 Year Olds". It contains a detailed analysis of almost every biological being seen by men. Some people say it's just a crappy collection that get's shittier as the pages go on, but you know the truth. How, if not thanks to this knowledge fountain, would you ever found out about the dangerous DUSTBUN, the beast that roams DUSTY CORNERS in search of fresh human meat? Or SNOCONES, looking like innocent ice-cream in the middle of the JUNGLE, but when you try to eat them, they eat your tongue? Yeah, this book has saved your life countless times. Better captchalogue this thing.

** Red: Store everything else**

Wait! Are you sure you're not forgetting something?

** Red: Captchalogue worms**

No! Not that you IMBECILE!

** Red: Equip Augmented reality go-goggles**

Yeah, that's what you need. You equip the goggles, then connect them to your Laptop. Huzzah! Now you can display your screen on your goggles. Now, what you were doing.

** Red: Send Umineko the present.**

You open (again) the "Someone's PC's" Application. It lets you send anything from one PC to other, and the receiver will get it like a zipped file. When he/she unzip it, ta-dah! the object will materialize in front of them.

You take out the present and start scanning it with the Goggles analyzer. A progress bar appears on the corner of your screen. The present is not that heavy so it will take a few seconds.

Meanwhile you check Sfrub progress bar and you notice both the present and the game will be ready at the same time. You're sure Umi will like both things happening at the same time. And 10, 9, 8...

Y'know, better be another person for a moment.


	3. Be CR

Well, you're CR, but let's give her a better name ok? Or better not. See that thing up in her door? Yup, that's her nameplate. It says HUNGER EVERDEEN.

**Examine room**

Your name is HUNGER EVERDEEN. You're 16 years old, 2 years short of ESCAPING FROM THIS USELESS DEATHLY TRADITION. Which do you ask? BEING SORTED TO KILL EACH ONE EVERY YEAR. But whatever, today might be the day you're escaping from it altogether.

You have plenty of interest, none of which of SILLY NATURE. Where you live KIDS are TRAINED with MILITARY WAYS, so you learned how to be DISCIPLINED. One of your key hobbies is HUNTING, so you never had to pass HUNGER which is kind ironic. You tend to REBEL AGAINST THE GOVERNMENT which is why other of your hobbies is SEWING FRILLY DRESSES and LIBERAL USE OF MAKEUP, because, let's face it, there's no respecting SOLDIER who would use that much MAKEUP.

Your room reflects all of this. There's WARDROBES FULL OF WEAPONS AND OUTFITS, SEWING MACHINES OF VARIOUS MODELS, and even a MAKEUP STATION, or VANITY, like CIVILIANS like to call it. On the walls there's different PROSTEST POSTERS, detailing your favorite REBELLIOUS LEADERS, and behind your bed you like to SCRATCH THE WALL to mark the days before your NEXT BIRTHDAY. Right now there's 129 SCRATCHES.

What will you do?

**Hunger: Prepare gift**

Besides the obvious DAY OF RECKONING, today is your friend UMINEKO's birthday, and you prepared a special gift for him or her. You really don't care after all this years. And why would you care? GENDER hasn't stopped you in the past. If Umineko doesn't want to divulge his/her gender, that's the witch problem.

You take out the CILIDRICAL BOX from your Sylladex SURVIVAL MODUS. It allows you to store objects in a physical backpack, and you can deploy them whenever you want. It may not be the flashiest Sylladex but it's practical. Another thing it does is deploying automatically any item you may need in the right amount to cover your needs, like if you're starving it rations your food and water for you to survive the longest time available. That said, you always keep NON-EXPIRATIONAL FOOD and WATER inside just in case.

Inside the CILINDRICAL BOX you put the PRESENT and close it with the press of a button. Outside you stick Umineko's address on a tag. You then take it to your window and toss it to the air, where a HUMONGOUS SHIP retrieves it and continues its course. The GOVERNMENT may be AWFUL, but at least they know how to do their shipping job.

Now, let's get down on business. Without wasting another moment, you equip your trusty BOW AND QUILL in your STRIFE SPECIBUS under BOWKIND, and your KNIFE under the stop stating the obvious.

**Hunger: Stop stating the obvious**

You stop with your sass.

**Hunger: Answer Pesterchum**

You turn your PC on. You really don't like to waste energy letting it on standby, so you turn it off whenever you stop using it. Resource management is the key to survival.

Well, it seems that TS has created a memo under your friend's group. You should really stop calling him TS like you didn't know his name. Anyway… You already read this conversation last chapter, so let's jump to the part you didn't read ok?

TS: PLeasedontkillmepleasedontki llme…

CR: You… You!

CR: n_n thanks a lot soldier!

TS: WU… what…

CR: Well, see you on the Medium! Bu-bye!

CR: May the odds be ever in your favor! ~o*

CR left the memo

TS: THefuck…

TS closed the memo

**Hunger: Install game**

You take the Sfrub disc out of your Sylladex and introduce it on your PC. It takes a little to boot but finally the installation window appears. It will take a while, so you suppose it's better to let it be.

Meanwhile you consider it's best to go outside and get some more supplies.

**Hunger: Check for guardian**

You silly goose! Your guardian has been dead for a while so let's not worry. Her ashes are kept on a box in the living room. You often like to talk to the box, as she wasn't that bad of a guardian and you're kind of glad she was finished before you had to do it for her. But this time you need to hurry and… Well, that's fucking perfect.

There are government sentries all over outside. You really hate those things, they're bullet-proof, arrow-proof, knife-proof and all kinds of proofs. You think maybe they're not magic proof but that shit doesn't exist. You don't have the time to deal with these. Then you have to conform with the supplies you have on your fridge, but they're not that fresh and durable as whatever you could find on the wild

**Hunger: Retrieve supplies from fridge**

You scavenge the fridge and captchalogue every food item you could find, almost without looking. Good thing your Modus turns things into cards or you wouldn't be able to save all those STRIPS OF DRY VENISON and the DEHYDRATED WATER, like how the fuck does that thing works. But you have more important things to worry about. Like why the government deployed all those sentries around your house? Not that you're paranoid, but you haven't done a thing to them, outside of CYBER ACTIVISM but you know they don't care that much for you to deploy an attack of that caliber. You run to the stairs and lock yourself in your room.

**Hunger: Pester Umineko**

Once in your room, you check your PC. The Sfrub installation window marks close to 50% of completion and you couldn't be more relieved. At least you will escape from this situation soon enough. You decide to look for Umineko and see if your buddy is ok.

capitolRevolutionist (CR) began pestering goldenEqualizer (GE) at 3:14

CR: Err Umineko? Are you still there?

CR: Dude, or dudess, I don't really know/care, you don't answer

CR: I will call you dude regardless

CR: Is everything ok?

GE: ok, who the fuck told that incompetent dimwit to be my server?

CR: o_o Wut?

….

…. And you know the rest.

The conversation finishes and you take a deep breath. Really, trying to bond with that person is very energy consuming. But it's a price you're willing to take.

You check on the progress bar and it's already on 83%. Let's leave it for a few seconds. While it finishes loading, you remember something you read about this game on Internet.

Apparently there's this weird artifact created after entering the Medium, which releases a thing called Kernelsprite, and you have to fuse it (or prototype) with something. This is supposedly one of the key aspects of the game you're about to play, so you have to choose carefully.

**Hunger: Tell others about Sprites**

capitolRevolutionist (CR) opened a memo on board WHY DO WE BOTHER

CR: Don't reply to this memo!

CR: Soldiers, you have to grab something, and that something must be intelligent, valuable or powerful.

CR: No silly things like mackerel or puppets or some shit like that.

CR: And DO NOT attempt to use a living person, I don't really know what happens to those u_u

CR: So be ready and may the odds ever be in your favor ~o*

CR banned herself from responding the memo

And there they go. Well, you have to follow your own advice then.

**Hunger: Go get something to prototype.**

You look around your room for things that may fit the description you just made. But there's nothing you think that fits the description, besides dresses, makeup and weapons. So you decide to run downstairs and there you see it.

You swiftly grab your guardian's urn and run upstairs, preparing yourself. You put the ashes on the desk and look at the progress bar. A countdown appears: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3…


	4. Be TS

Sorry, but you cannot be TS at the moment. You see, he's still chatting from the bathroom, and if you become him, your isometric perspective will make it possible to peek at other people doing their… business there, and that would be awful. Really awful. So let's be someone else for the moment ok?

**Be Umineko**

You're suddenly Umineko. Yup, we're where we started. Is that a problem? I hope not. Let's get down to business shall we?

**Umineko: Check memo**

You check the memo Hunger posted on the team's group. You're tempted to reply while she's typing but you remember the last chat you had with her and you suppose this game could be serious, so cooperation may be vital.

However, you take her advice and make a mental note to check the surroundings for something optimal to prototype.

**Umineko: Check Sfrub installation**

The installation window for Sfrub blinks and then a button appears with the word "start". You're hesitant to press it as you don't know your partner's status as of now, so you open the Pesterchum before doing stupid things (again).

goldenEqualizer (GE) began pestering compulsiveCatcher (CC) at 3:30

GE: red dude are you ready?

GE: …

GE: is anybody there?

GE: *incompetent little dweeb* answer the damn thing!

CC: -Wild CC appears!-

GE: oh at last

GE: what keep you busy?

CC: -GE uses Question-

GE: dude you have to stop that

CC: -CC uses Answer: don't worry :D-

GE: right now

GE: were about to start this shit and this rp stuff is getting on my nerves

GE: so for once i will ask nicely for you to stop this charade and report your status

GE: i promise i will not knock your pc again

CC: -CC can't stop himself-

GE: ok this is getting creepy

GE: you seriously have some problems

GE: but sigh

GE: -ge uses sfrub-

GE: -should ge use it?-

GE: -is cc ready to use sfrub on ge?-

CC: -CC uses Sfrub on GE!-

compulsiveCatcher (CC) ceased pestering goldenEqualizer (GE)

**Umineko: Start game**

You take that as a sign you have to start your own version. So you start your own copy of Sfrub and a line of dialog appears above the start button

-_Server detected. Press Start to initiate connection_

Hesitant, you press the button. And… nothing changes. You wonder what could be happen.

**Umineko: Be the other guy**

Wow, you really can be the dramatic player. You start being Red.  
Except that well, you cannot be Red right now as he's fighting his Guardian and that would throw his guard. Let's try being Hunger.

**Red: Be Hunger**

You stop being Red and start being Hunger, exactly on the same point you stopped being her last chapter.

2, 1…

A new window opens with the Sfrub logo on top and a huge "Start" button, and hey, there's a text line over it:

-_Server detected. Press Start to initiate connection_

So it means Umineko already entered, you think. Well then the next logical step has to be pressing the button.

You press it. Nothing happens. You think it's better if you contact Umineko.

**Hunger: Pester Umineko**

capitolRevolutionist (CR) began pestering goldenEqualizer (GE) at 3:34

CR: Dude! I started it! ._. Now what

GE: eh?

GE: oh, that

CR: Awaiting instructions!

GE: huh, theres a button here that wasnt here before

GE: gotta press it

GE: ….

GE: hey! i can see you, smile

CR: No time for tomfoolery

GE: right right

Suddenly you feel something is moving. You look back and wtf! Your bed is floating! Suddenly it goes flying to the left and smashes through the wall. You hurry to the new hole in your bedroom and look outside. The forest seems fine, but it seems that a solitary sentry was patrolling outside it at that precise moment, and now it's flat as a tortilla.

Your instincts react at the moment and you take the sentry as fast as you can from under the bed. You pull it inside and hide it on a drawer. Let's hope the others don't notice.

GE: cackle cackle cackle

GE: this shit is too funny to not abuse

GE: hey hungy, you want an extreme makeover?

GE: i can make your entire house a closed room ;)

CR: Fuck!

CR: Stop with that! They will spot me! _

CR: Now rebuild that wall in this instant soldier!

GE: youre such a tighass

GE: well, i guess i can do that

GE: … how do I do that?

CR: Let me check the Walkthrough

CR: It says the second button is for "building and house expansion"

CR: Try that

GE: ok…

You hear a new sound. Apparently there's an expansion to your room, sloppily constructed by your server. Well, at least the sentries won't notice the bed and the fact that there's oil on the floor.

GE: hows that for a good job?

CR: Seen better.

GE: asshole

CR: Now… fuck!

GE: what now? i didn't do a thing

CR: Not that. The Walkthrough says "Don't attempt to build anything till you have a good source of Building Grist, also wait till you deploy your necessary artifacts (found on [PR01])"

GE: whats that supposed to mean?

CR: Lemme have a look.

CR: Ummm, the 4 button, the one with a card and a cube. Press it.

GE: well, it shows a menu with 3 new shits

CR: First one is the Cruxtruder.

CR: Second one is the Totem Lathe.

CR: Third one is the Alchemiter.

CR: As for their functions, they're on another part of the Walkthrough.

CR: Anyway, here says that for practical purposes you're supposed to deploy them near each other.

CR: What was that sound?!

**Hunger: Examine room expansion**

You hear a new *thump* sound. Apparently, your idiot of a server deployed the Alchemiter on the room expansion, leaving it behind your bed. It seems the spot was basically perfect for its size. The bed start to move again and you barely manage to duck. It lands in front of your vanity, and the room starts to feel a little cramped. You inspect the new construction.

It appears to be formed by a cylindrical platform and a couple of tubes at the side. According to the Walkthrough it's the last step to the item creation, and you're supposed to insert a Totem on one of those tubes to do it.

CR: Ok, that was nice from you, it fits perfectly.

CR: Now, as to where could the others be deployed…

GE: leave it to me |i can do it|

GE: cackle cackle cackle

CR: I'm not too fond of what happens next…

CR: Listen! I'm pretty cramped up here, lemme see what can be destroyed to make space…

…

**Hunger: Destroy stuff**

You equip yourself with your trusty knife, and you start spotting the different parts of your room. You're lucky you're not very materialistic and don't mind getting rid of useless furniture. You also think you shouldn't say that in front of Umineko, as the idiot has a furniture fetish of some sort.

Then you see the bed. Well, it was a nice bed, but there are more important things ahead. With a swift pirouette, you cut it in pieces and in the same fashion, you throw the pieces outside the window.

Bad instincts. You hear a metallic sound and you look outside. Great, another sentry knocked out by the bed. You look behind and you see your vanity floating and vibrating, as if the entity holding it was having a laughing fit. You decide to ignore it and take the sentry before something else happens.

A loud sound reaches you and suddenly the wall behind disappears. It appears that Umineko has repeated the same steps like last time and made a new spot in your room. And like last time, it covers your misdeeds perfectly. However, it also brought back parts of the bed into the room.

You take the sentry and shove it on the same closet.

CR: Well, that was unexpected.

GE: cackle cackle cackle

GE: *this is pure gold* my sides

CR: Fuck off.

CR: Anyway, let's get rid of this mess

GE: which one? the bed one or the sentry one?

CR: Bed one.

GE: cant you shove it under your bed?

GE: oh wait, cackle cackle cackle

CR: Idiot.

GE: anyway, put it on your closet for the moment

CR: Yeah, will see if it fits.

**Hunger: Shove bed on closet**

No such luck. Your bed is filled with robo-guts and weapons.

You try to take them off your bedroom, is not like you're stuck here. And there it is, spread on your living room. Now you wonder why you didn't think about taking your stuff out of your bedroom. X2 facepalm combo!

Well, you think it's better to return.

And apparently in your absence Umineko deployed the Cruxtruder in the new spot made by the second accident with the bed. It fits like a glove. And the Totem Lathe is safely deployed at the right side of your computer desk. It's kind of cramped but you can reach its most vital parts at least. Also, in the desk there's a card you suppose it's the Pre-Punched Card

CR: Good job dude! n_n

CR: Now to the next stage.

GE: hold on, *weird shit is happening here*

GE: gotta go

CR: Wait!

goldenEqualizer (GE) ceased pestering capitolRevolutionist (CR)

CR: -_-

**Hunger: Proceed to next stage**

You wonder what happened to your pal. Unfortunately, you're not her server so you cannot look at it. But this game has to continue.

Next step, as the Walkthrough says, is to open the Cruxtruder hatch. It needs a sufficiently strong impact to open, that's why you needed Umineko to drop something heavy on it. But if your server cannot do it, you guess you can.

So you reach to the closet with all the robotic shit and pull out one of those sentries. Using all your strength, you do a German Suplex with it and to the lid.

Then it happens. The machine starts to flash in a orange light and a weird light is emitted from it. A spherical entity appears. This must be the Kernelsprite the guide talks about. Also, the base of the Cruxtruder marks a countdown, thing that you don't remember reading about on the guide. The thing marks 5 minutes and counting.

Anyway, you decide to make haste and start prototyping this shit. You think on throwing it your guardian ashes, but then you look at the floor and see the sentry. Well, that thing is powerful so it meets the criteria.

**Hunger: Prototype the Sentry**

You use another German Suplex on the poor sentry and throw it at the Kernelsprite. It starts to shine and then the ball of light explodes in an array of multiple colors.

So, this is what Prototyping means. When the lights fade off, the ball of light is still there, but now it has a robotic face and arm. You try to communicate with it but it just emits weird metallic noises. Well, there's another Prototyping tier, so it has to be normal it behaves like this.

Then you hear it.

Birds are revolting. Trees are falling. Some animals begin to run and yell like crazy. But that's not what you heard.

You go to your living room (as the last incident left you without windows), and then you see it. A huge smoke tower rises from far away in the forest. And then you hear it again.

It has started. Rocks are falling from the sky. And you can see a small fireball slowly approaching your house. What will you do?


	5. Hunger: Prepare for the worst

As meteors start falling from the sky while burning parts of the forest you start thinking what to do.

There's the fact that you haven't started TS session, so his whereabouts are unknown as of now. Also, you haven't finished the whole initiation process necessary. You need to retrieve the cruxite from the Cruxtruder and create your Session fee, as the Walkthrough said. And still, there's Umineko and Red.

Well, standing in the middle of the door while looking like an idiot to the sky never helped anyone. You snap from your own thoughts and get to the action.

The thing is, you have to decide between 2 things: Help TS or finish your initiation ritual?

**Hunger: Finish initiation ritual**

You've been so absorbed in your mind that you haven't noticed the Kernelsprite is still following you around. You take the cruxite from the Cruxtruder tube which looks like a really hard orange putty. You take the pre-punched card on your desk and assemble both that and the cruxite on the Totem Lathe. When you turn it on, the cruxite takes a weird form like a vase.

Last step is to alchemize the Session fee. There's a small platform on the Alchemiter, with an area more or less the size of the weird blue putty. You suppose that's the place where you should deploy it.

A strange robotic arm appears from the top of the Alchemiter and takes you by surprise, so you react and deploy your combat knife. However you calm once you see it centers it's attention in the cruxite. After some scanning a huge blue beam appears from it and…

An orange bush appears from the Alchemiter base. Suddenly, from one of its twigs a cluster of berries grows. What will you do?

**Hunger: Help TS**

You look behind and you notice the screen of your computer is flashing. You let the bush alone and proceed to your device.

toymakerScareless (TS) began pestering capitolRevolutionist (CR)

TR: heLP….

TR: a FREAKING METEOR SHOWER IN THE CAMPUS…

TR: ….

toymakerScareless (TS) ceased pestering capitolRevolutionist (CR)

CR: Soldier! o_o

CR: Don't give up! I'm on my way!

You open the Sfrub window. Apparently TS connected with you some time ago.

The screen shows TS alone on what it seems to be his campus building roof. He's running like a scared chicken. What will you do?

**Hunger: Drop the Sfrub artifacts.**

As fast as you can, you open the Phernalia Registry and look at the options. You look at the window and smile thankfully to TS for choosing a place with so much space. Then you start deploying the artifacts on a row, and finally the Pre-punched Card near TS. You close the window and proceed to do whatever you were doing.

**Hunger: Eat the berries**

You proceed to the Alchemiter, and take the berries. In that moment, the bush disappears, leaving you only with its fruit. The Kernelsprite is shinning like crazy.

You take a look at the base of your Cruxtruder. Well, the clock marks there's still less than 2 minutes ahead, so you think you're lucky. The forest, not so much.

As the berries touch your lips, you hear a metallic sound. You still have time so you check what caused it. You get off the Alchemiter and walk to your door, but before you can take another step, a laser hits the spot you were about to step on.

Startled, you look in front of you. Sentries, 4 of them. But these are different from the ones you knocked out didn't, and you can't put your finger on what. You take out your bow and prepare to Strife, when another laser knocks it off from your hand.

Now is the time. Bite the berries!

**Hunger: Bite the berries**

It all seems like in slow motion. You hang on the berries and take them to your mouth, and at the same time, the Sentry raises its arm and aims towards you. The berries touch your teeth and you open your mouth. The sentry shots a round. You can feel the berry juice in your mouth.

Or is it blood?

**Just a few hours before.**

You are now Red, in the same spot we left you in chapter 2. Well, time to face your destiny.

Sfrub is finally installed. A window opens, and there's a button that spells "Start", and over it, a text line reading:

-_Server detected. Press Start to initiate connection_

You press Start as commanded. Nothing changes from your point of view

**Red: Answer Pesterchum**

It appears TS wants to communicate with you. You open the Pesterchum.

toymakerScareless (TS) began pestering compulsiveCatcher (CC)

TS: -TS decides to run-

CC: -TS escapes safely-

TS: OK… let's talk of business…

CC: hiiiiiii :3

TS: HI… so, i will have to help you with this…

TS: SOrry if i'm being too cold but this thing is not as joke-matter as i though it would be

TS: SO let's behave with caution… ok?

CC: eeeeyup :I

TS: HAve you confronted your guardian…?

CC: nnnnuoooop

TS: WEll… you have to do it now…

TS: MEanwhile i'll deploy everything neccesary for your arrival to the medium...

CC: doooo i have toooo? :'(

CC: heeees too nicee D:

TS: WEll, you can attempt to catch him on one of your glasses, if that's what's bothering you

CC: hes tooo difficult to catch

CC: ... i will tryyyyyy :D

CC: thaaaanks ts your a good frond :-*

TS: FOr once say my name correctly...

compulsiveCatcher (CC) ceased pestering toymakerScareless (TS)

**Red: Go downstairs and confront him**

You check your Captchadex one last time. Yup, you have all the necessary things, and your Strife Deck is in order. You suppose it's now or never.

As you descend your staircase, you hear something in your head. It whispers you "It's time". That has to be your Guardian. Your skin shivers and you start feeling goosebumps all over your body. You feel the need of equipping one of your captured beasts, a TURKHEAT, caught in a fireproof glass bottle.

You're on your living room, scared as fuck. There's no sign of your Guardian anywhere. What will you do?

**Red: Go to the dining room**

You're moving but you feel like floating. Because of the adrenaline rush you don't notice you stamped your feet on the table. You accede to the dinner room and notice something weird. All the furniture is gone.

Then you hear a noise, like if someone was dropping heavy things on your house. You hear another sound, but this time a lot less noisy and coming from top of your head. Apparently you didn't unequip your Go-Goggles and someone is pestering you. You rush to a wall and put them on to see what's going on.

It's Umineko and TS, and as much as you would love to talk to them, you have more important things going on right now. Also you don't have a keyboard. You activate the Auto-responder for Umineko, and you're about to do the same for TS, but you see what he's typing

toymakerScareless (TS) began pestering compulsiveCatcher (CC)

TS: -TS decides to run-

TS: REddy... i'm sorry for destroying your living room

TS: BUt there wasn't any place where i drop this stuff

TS: BOth the alchemizer and the totem lathe are deployed there...

TS: BUt for the cruxtruder...

TS: OH... look... your dining room is empty...

TS: ...

TS: I'M such a dummy right...

TS: WEll... don't mind me...

TS: OH... and your guardian is on the kitchen

TS: BE prepared...

toymakerScareless (TS) ceased pestering compulsiveCatcher (CC)

So, your Guardian is on the kitchen right? Then you should move there. You remove your Go-Goggles and put them back on your head.

But as you try to make a step something appears in front of you. You really forgot important things right? As you forgot your Guardian can Teleport.

And that's how things are. Your Guardian, an humanoid beast the size of an adult, with protruding horns, weird appendices connecting parts of its body, a big head and a blue tail, appears in front of your eyes.

Guardianlog

Red: miiiister purrthree D: hiiii

Purrthree: "Hello my child"

Purrthree: "I can assume you know what day is this?"

Red: mmmmai burtday siiir?

Purrthree: "Correct. I hope you have a happy birthday"

Purrthree: "Even though I can't allow that to happen, sadly"

Purrthree: "You see, you know why we follow this millenary tradition, my boy?"

Red: nnnoupe :(

Purrthree: "It's quite simple, you see. To weed the weaklings. We lusus have the honorable task of watching for the human race"

Purrthree: "It may seem like the contrary, but the truth is, we're on even terms with all of you. If you manage to kill me on your twelfth birthday, not a single lusus will seek revenge, as they will see you as a full formed individual capable of defending yourself. On the other side, if I kill you, you will be mourned over, given a sepulture and I will be assigned to another baby to care for. I will train him or her like I did with you so he can kill me on his or her twelfth birthday"

Purrthree: "And the cycle will repeat"

Red: uuuuuuugh!111

Red: whiiiy do u wanna diiie? whiayyyy? i don wanna kill ya sir, i liiiiike you :'(

Purrthree: "You won't kill me entirely. If a lusus dies, he or she just reincarnates. Too bad your species can't, and I'm not meaning that in a spiteful way, but I really feel sorry."

Purrthree: "I also love you my child. That's why I'm looking forward you giving all your might and strength. Make me proud"

Red: …

Red: wwwweeell, tooooo bad :I

Red: yooooure a luuusus

Red: thaaaaaat means… I can catch you :)

Purrthree: "Well, let's see if you can"

**Red: Strife!**

You use Aggrieve!

You throw the bottle in your hand to a few inches from Purrthree. The bottle breaks and bits of it fly in his direction, sustaining minor wounds. A turkey comes out the ball and it sends some fireballs on his direction.

Your Guardian uses Auto-Parry!

Purrthree invokes a wall of light and blocks almost all the attacks, but a single fireball hits him on his knee. You prepare your next attack.

You use Aggrieve!

Turkheat sends another wave of fireballs, and this time, Purrthree blocks all of them with his wall.

Your Guardian uses Aggressive Counter!

Using his telekinetic powers, Purrthree makes your poor turkey levitate a few feets off the ground. Then he makes a motion with his hand and throws it to you. The impact is so strong the poor beast gets knocked off and you flinch, unable to do an action for the next turn.

Your Guardian uses Anti-air Punishment!

Now, all defenseless, your guardian uses an invisible force to make you levitate. He holds you from the neck, asphyxiating you slowly. You start to lose consciousness. What will you do?

**Help Red**

The only person who could even hope to help Red is TS. Would you like to be TS for a second?

**Be TS**

No time for introductions. You're in a crisis state but you actually have more time than Red

As TS, you zoom in your friend's home, to the living room. He's not there. You zoom into the dining room. Then you see him, his guardian, and a unconscious turkey on the floor. What will you do?

**TS: Drop something heavy on the Purrthree**

There's nothing on the dining room besides the Cruxtruder, and you can't lift that one, so you return to the living room. There's a small sofa, a table, some bookshelves and a TV station. What will you take?

**TS: Take a bookshelf**

You try to fit a bookshelf on the door, but unfortunately, it doesn't accede. You throw it violently at the door frame and it makes a hole on it. The bookshelf touches Purrthree but he repels it with a psychic attack. So your plan of dropping something on him won't work. Think! Red doesn't have much time left! The Cruxtruder is still lying there… That's it!

**TS: Open Cruxtruder**

You know that by opening it, you're giving him another death sentence, but at least this one will allow him more time to live. You take another bookshelf, and using the now wider "door", you drop it on the Cruxtruder. It bounces off to Purrthree, who repels it without breaking a sweat.

The Cruxtruder opens, and sends off a red light. In that moment, a small red ball emerges from it and looks for Red. However, on his path it meets Purrthree, who, for some reason, doesn't make any attempt to evade it…

**Be Red again**

As Red, you collapse on the floor. You're exhausted, breathless and have this huge urge to barf on the fine tapestry your cherished Guardian has bought for your pleasure. Speaking of which… Why did he stopped chocking you?

You look in front of you and see him. But he looks different. More reddish, and he also has another kind of tail. Oh and he glows?

Congratulations! Your PURRTHREE evolved into a PURRTHREESPRITE!

What will you do?

**Red: Attempt to communicate with new form of life**

Spritelog

Red: siiiir? issat u?

Purrthreesprite: "… I'm afraid so"

Red: wiiiill u try to kiiilll me now siiir? D:

Purrthreesprite: "… I don't think so"

Purrthreesprite: "You see, my child, I'm not your Guardian anymore. Well, not as a social title, I will still look for your well being though. I don't have any obligation to attack you, au contraire, it is now my duty to protect you at any cost"

Purrthreesprite: "Now, get on your feet again. There's still more to do. Like commuting with your friend there"

You look at what Purrthreesprite is pointing at. Apparently both Umineko and TS are pestering you. But you will attend those conversations in a moment. You still have to give your Guardian a peace hug.

What will you do now?


	6. Be TS, again (interactive)

Be TS, again.

You're TS for a second time, but this time you're not on a hurry, or in the bathroom for that matter. You know what that means? That's right! Introduction time! No need to name him thought, he's 20.

**Introduce TS**

Your real name is ANDY PIXAR. Right now you're not on your COLLEGE ROOM, but close, you're on your COLLEGE ROOF. There's METEORS FALLING EVERYWHERE and you're really SCARED, but you still have time.

Judging by the contents of your BACKPACK, you're an avid ANIMATION fan. You're fond of CHILDREN CARTOONS and 3D ANIMATION, so much, you're enrolled in this institution to learn how to create your own SILLY ALL FAMILY MOVIES. You're a self-proclaimed TOY CONNOISSEUR, and you could discuss that topic for hours, even on this SITUATION you're positioned in. On your free time you like to WRITE KIDDIE FICTION, particularly the ones with MONSTERS, SUPERHEROES or CARS on it, and you have quite your fanbase, composed mostly of ADORABLE YOUNG READERS and WEIRD ADULTS WITH GOOD TASTE.

But enough with introductions, let's get going.

**Examine roof**

The roof you're on now is a simple grey floor. You're on the biggest building on the campus. From where you are, you can see meteors falling to every building, destroying them, and shaking yours, but it doesn't fall as of now. All the students were evacuated, and it seems you're the only soul here.

You're standing in front of your computer, which is connected to the school Wi-Fi signal, and also to a power generator you always carry on. You have your Pesterchum open, and also the Sfrub game running. In your screen you can see Red hugging his sprite. You left him a message a second ago.

Beside you, you can see all the artifacts listed on the Phernalia Registry: Cruxtruder, Alchemiter and Totem Lathe. You already captchalogged the Pre-Punched Card.

What will you do?

[from here on, Progression will be made based on Reader commands, and the chapter will be updated accordingly, no new chapter created unless needed]


	7. 6a (cont)

**Author: Introduce Homestuck and/or Hetalia. ****_(Pachimew)_**

You attempt to channel this strange entity called AUTHOR, creator of EVERYTHING and NOTHING AT THE SAME TIME. However, you notice this aura of ASSHOLERY that tells you in a whisper "No…"

As you try to evade it and continue with the story, you hear the same whispering voice "t now…"

Your eyes start to tear a little as a ray of hope emerges from all the ASSHOLERY, just for it to extinguish at the voice of "Not never". That was actually a double negative, and you're not sure what does it means anymore… Let's continue with the story ok?

**Andy: Pester Red ****_(Pachimew)_**

toymakerScareless (TS) began pestering compulsiveCatcher (CC)

TS: REddy... hear me out... stop hugging him

TS: UNless you wanna share a brain with your Guardian and such...

TS: LOok... take a hint... he's pushing you

TS: OH... don't squeeze him tighther... for goodness sake...

TS: SOrry... we need you... A little scare now and then is not that bad...

TS: ... HOpe that helps

CC: -TS scares CC-

CC: -CC escaped safely-

TS: ANd now you're in your room... I suppose that last messages were your auto-responder right...

CC: DDDDD: duuuuude

CC: whhhhyyyy did uuuu treeeww dat ttaaable overrre heere?

CC: DDDDD:

TS: REddy please read the conversation so far...

CC: huuuuh?

CC: whwhwhwhhwwhaaaaat? DDD:

TS: YEah...

TS: YOu see... the act of prototyping entails two tiers...

TS: YOur sprite... i mean... mr. purrthree

CC: heee insist you call hiiim mr. purrsprite :3

TS: OK... mr. purrsprite... well... you have to fuse him with something else...

TS: BUt not now... according to the walkthrough hunger gave to me... only a fool would prototype to a second tier at this moment...

TS: YOu hear me...?

CC: OK! :] noooo mooore jokes rite?

TS: YEah... you're taking this witha complete maturity... i'm sou proud of you reddy...

CC: :3

TS: OK... well... follow the advice from mr. purrsprite... he knows what to do...

TS: I still have my own problems to deal... are we clear...?

CC: YESSIR! :3

TS: GOod boy... i trust you're gonna be succesful...

TS: WEll, gotta go...!

TS: TAke care...

CC: :3

toymakerScareless (TS) ceased pestering compulsiveCatcher

At least you're sure Red will be safe.

Another meteor falls, and this one is near your building. The ground shivers, but calms after a moment. It shaves a year from your lifespan, and more if this continues like this. What will you do?


	8. 6b (cont)

**Red: Ignore Andy and prototype second tier (Pachimew)**  
You got no idea what's prototyping. It must be one of those big words people around you. You ask Mr. Purrsprite for guidance (also, what's guidance?, you ask yourself). He shakes his head.  
A voice echoes on your head: "There's a time and place for everything, but not now, my child" You suppose it's Mr. Purrsprite using telepathy.

You resume control over Andy.

**Andy: Get your server to set up your totem lathe and cruxtruder thingys (Pachimew)**  
Before another thing happens, you know you have to begin your session.  
Fortunately Hunger left you with your Totem Lathe and Cruxtruder thingy, along with the other stuff needed, already deployed, and near you.

You proceed to the first part, that is opening the Cruxtruder hatch. Now, you look around to see if there's something heavy you can use to open it. No sign of it... But right then a small meteor approaches you! You duck, only for it to hit instead the Cruxtruder. Somehow it survives the impact, with a few scratches, but well, at least it opened.

From it, a yellow light emerges, and a floating misterious orb appears. That must be your Kernelsprite. You check the timer on the base...

It marks you have less than 2 minutes. Hurry up! Now that the Cruxtruder is open, you spin the knob and release a yellow cruxite.

You take it to the Totem Lathe with the Pre-punched Card and shape it as fast as you can. You almost drop it on the way to the Alchemiter, but now you place it on the small base and wait.

A needle appears to be analyzing it and then...

A toy model of a house tied to a globe emerges from the base of the Alchemiter. It's floating a few inches from the floor, and it seems the house is anchoring it. The Kernelsprite reacts violently and starts making unrecognizable noises. It reminds you you haven't prototyped it yet.

What will you do?


	9. 6c (cont)

**Andy: Quickly toss in your handy desk lamp (Pachimew)**  
You open your Sylladex. Some people often tell you you have the most pointless and complicated Sylladex they ever seen, but the truth is you've never had a problem with that.  
Your modus is called LIFEBREATH. And as such, it gives sentience to anything you captchalogue. It comes with a price though. You've never seen your stuff moving, but retrieving something from it depends on the willingness the object has to be retrieved. That's why people think it's pointless. But you disgress. You treat every object you touch like it was a member of your family.  
Your toys love you, your gadgets love you, even your weapons love you. So they're always ready for action.  
You check your sylladex and there's a handy desk lamp. You call her "Flexy". Well, you successfully retrieve her, so it may seem she want's to play.  
As quick as you can you toss her to the Kernelsprite. A yellow flash blinds you for a second, but then you recover your sight.  
The yellow orb now has a lamp head and it's making weird electric noises. Now's the time to destroy the "Entry fee"!

**Andy: Wonder where the strange voice in your head is coming from**  
Now, before you do it, you start contemplating why are you following these commands, but you think this is getting too meta so you drop it. There's more important things to do, like wondering why does that mouse pointer is following you... AAAARGH! TOO META AGAIN!. You should really stop that or I'm commanding the guy commanding you to command you to jump from the building, and you know I'm not kidding.  
As you shake your head, all the meta goes away, along with the pointer and the voice. You check the clock on the Cruxtruder. There's less than a minute. A bright orange light illuminates the building, even though the sun still shining. You look behind and see the most unnecessarily enormous meteor approaching you. You have to act now.


	10. 6d (cont)

**Andy: Flip out**  
On a fit of desperation you scream like a retard and start running around the Alchemizer, while screaming "IM gonna die...!" How do you scream ellipsis it's a mystery.  
Well, at least in that feat of unnecessary tomfoolery you managed to trip and fall on the yellow toy house, breaking it to pieces.  
A yellow light envelops you as you try to stand up. It starts to grow and cover the entire building. But then you see it.  
The other building as tall as this. At the same time as yours, it starts glowing with a grey light. The whole building disappears and before you can say anything, your world flashes.  
Where are you now? You don't know...

**Hunger: Enter the Medium and examine your land**

You can't do that. The berry you were about to bite falls to the floor. Following it, your almost lifeless body.  
There's a gap between your collarbones, a single laser shot penetrated through you body. Slowly, you fade out of this existence...  
Only to be brought again.  
Your view readjust itself. You can feel the energy passing through your body again.  
You look at your hand. It looks pretty normal... If it's normal to you having a robotic orange glowing arm. The Sentries look confused, as confused as a unfeeling being can look.  
You're Hungersprite. What will you do?


	11. 6e (cont)

**Hungersprite: Flip out**

You don't have to tell her. As soon as you grasp the situation, you start flapping your arms like crazy, shooting some lasers along the way.  
Huh, that seems pretty cool but you don't realize it, because you're pretty busy freaking out. Some of the lasers destroy bits of the walls, floor, ceiling, even one knocks out the robot which killed you.  
That last shot makes the Sentry go short circuit, and suddenly KABOOM. Well, you have a new wider doorframe and the other Sentries just exploded along their partner.  
That makes you snap, and realize something.  
Somehow, you know everything about the game now, but along with it, you also feel that you can't spit it all. You look around your room, looking for the thing you were about to do... and there it is.  
The berry cluster is lying on the floor. You retrieve it. The artifact must be destroyed.  
Also, the countdown marks there's just a minute left for extintion. There's someone pestering you on the computer.  
What will you do?


	12. 6f (final cont)

**Hungersprite: Answer them**

goldenEqualizer (GE) began pestering capitolRevolutionist (CR)

GE: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck  
GE: incompetent asshole answer this shit!  
GE: dont die on me  
GE: *youre not allowed to die you hear me*  
CR: WOW, DIDN'T KNEW YOU WERE SO INTERESTED IN ME O_O  
GE: ew no  
GE: i mean, i saw you dying up there  
GE: also why are you typing on caps?  
CR: DUNNO DUDE. I THINK THE KEY GOT JAMMED.  
CR: AREN'T YOU LOOKING AT THE SCREEN?! ¬_¬  
GE: you died out there  
GE: then that sparkly shit floated to you and well  
GE: and now youre as a ghost as my girls up here  
GE: that reminds me  
GE: how does this prototyping shit works? can you remind me?  
CR: PRETTY SIMPLE. YOU JUST FUSE WHATEVER YOU FEEL CONVENIENT INTO THE KERNELSPRITE.  
CR: BUT ABOUT THE THING I SAID BEFORE, IT'S NOT ACTUALLY VERY CONVENIENT TO PROTOTYPE STRONG OR STURDY OBJECTS.  
CR: THE KEY IS BALANCE BETWEEN USEFULNESS AND POWER.  
CR: ALSO, UNLESS YOU WANT A VERY DIFFICULT GAME, YOU SHOULD PROTOTYPE *ONLY* ONE OBJECT BEFORE ENTERING THE MEDIUM.  
CR: SO, ARE YOU ALREADY ON PROTOTYPING STAGES? -W-  
GE: errr, you could say that  
CR: WHAT DO YOU MEAN? O_O  
GE: there might be some... uuuuh, possible misshape  
CR: O_O WUT?  
GE: errr, gotta go, |its not important actually|  
CR: RED CONFIRMATION SOLIDER IN THIS FUCKING INSTANT!  
GE: dont you got more important things?  
GE: like the cruxtruder clock having less than 30 secs?  
CR: OH  
CR: GOTTA GO  
CR: DON'T THING I'M FORGETTING THIS!  
GE: may the odds be ever in your favor you son of a bitch  
CR: ¬_¬

goldenEqualizer (GE) ceased pestering capitolRevolutionist (CR)

**Hungersprite: Eat berries after answering**  
With all said and done, you hurry up and take the berries you put on the table. You take a bite from the cluster.  
This bite makes the whole Artifact shine and surround the entire house. Of course you can't see what is being taken to the Medium, but at least you're free from that pesky meteor which was 10 seconds of killing you.  
A flash appears and you find yourself in another place. It seems that the Medium decided to just teleport your room or what remains of it.  
When you leave, you hear a deafening scream echoing all the place. From your experience on the wild you can deduce is a bird calling. From the biggest bird of prey ever seen  
Welcome to the Land of Birds and Electric Poles.

* * *

_[And with this finishes the interactive chapter :D. Thanks to everyone who participated, especially for Pachimew who was basically coauthor in this episode. I'll consider doing another interactive chapter sometime in the future. Begining chapter 7, I'll control the actions again]_


End file.
